75 Hilariously Funny Quotes That Will Force You To Laugh out Loud.

1) I'm the type of person that laugh at my own text I send bc I'm so funny.

2) It is ok to lose your shit sometimes because if you keep your shit, you will end up full of shit and then you'll explode and there'll be shit everywhere. A shit storm. And nobody wants that.

3) Hang on let me overthink this.

4) I can be in such a good mood and then boom I  don't like anyone no more

5) Do you ever just have that one class that one fucking class that depresses you when you think about it because oh god you hate it so much.

6) that moment when you wanna cry because of the academic pressure but don't have time because of academic pressure

7) I have been training all season to eat at super bowl party level.

8) Idk who needs to hear this but you're not an influencer..

9) I swear some songs have noises in the background that make me think my mom is shouting at me.. downstairs and it gets me every time

10) Fuck a deadline this work gets done in my own time.. 

11) My grades won't come with me in the grave but they'll take me there..

12) I'm really here begging my brain to be productive but this bitch won't listen.

13) "You took so long in the shower" yeah, I was at a concert..

14) dear self, sorry for this unhealthy sleeping routine..

15) The weekends are starting to feel like a 30 minutes lunch break... 

16) Nobody can piss you off like the person you love I swear they hit a different type of nerve...

17) More than half of my night is wasted in finding a comfortable sleeping position...

18) Going home to be ugly in peace is one of my favourite things to do...

 

19) I wanna be mad rich... im already mad so im half way there..

20) Where's my oscar for acting like everything is fine.. 

21) I'm sorry if u get seven texts in a row from me saying something i could have said in one message but i am who i am..

22) This is how my week goes:

Mooooonnnnnddaaaaaaaaay

Tueeeesssdaaaaaaayyyyy

Weeedddnnnesssdayyyyy

Thursssssdaaaaaaaayyyyy

Friday Saturday Sunday..

23) If I ever meet my past self I would definitely punch myself in the face..

24) I don't think some people understand that sitting in your own house in peace, eating snacks and minding your own business is priceless..

25) Eating a meal without watching something feels so illegal..

26) People who watch series just one day before exams fear nothing..

27) Sleeping is nice. It's like a free trial of being dead without hurting your friends and family..

28) You ever get bored, go to Netflix but then decide you're not ready for that kind of commitment rn so you end up watching youtube instread?..

29) i'm exhausted from all this studying i haven't done..

30) people who are using their phones without back cover don't care about anyone..

31) I am so dramatic that I have separate playlist of sad songs just for crying..

32) I'm a multitasker. I can disappoint 15 people at once..

33) Normalize lying to people who ask you lots of questions about your personal life..

34) Can't decide if I need a hug, an XL coffee, 6 shots of vodka or 2 weeks of sleep...

35) They say good things take time... That's why I'm always late...

36) My level of sarcasm has gotten to the point where I don't even know if I'm kidding or not...

37) I don't chat to anyone, my phone is for music and memes..

38) Isn't it cute that you literally tell your best friend everything like no embarrassment no shame nothing hidden. That's a proper best friend...

39) I will not be impressed with technology until I can download actual wine...

40) I might look like I'm doing nothing but in my head I'm quite busy..

41) why do parents feel the need to hold our phone when you're showing them something in it..

42) Parents need to realise comparison isn't motivation..

43) I'm officially at the age where if something is too loud I'm irritated lol..

44) If it requires fake smiling I'm not going.

45) I try to be a nice person but my mouth doesn't co-operate..

46) Aah yes iced coffee the most important meal of the day...

47) After drinking one month of green tea this lockdown, I have lost 1 kg of green tea!..

48) Do you ever get so bored

at work that you actually

start doing your job...

49) They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a bus...

50) I have nothing in common with people who only drink one glass of wine...

51) I wish i could date me im really everything i want in a person...

52) Its okay if you dont like me not everyone has good taste...

53) Seeing how long you get away with not washing your hair is an extreme sport...

54) No, i don't really rise and shine. most days, i just caffeinated and hope for the best...

55) Me wearing earrings, mask, glasses and earphones..

My ears: Do you want me to hold your bag too?...

56) That one guy in the classroom who will argue with teachers and entertain the whole class >>>

57) Keep your friends close and your glass of wine closer...

58) I want to sleep for 2 years and wake up with a degree, an apartment and money in the bank...

59) "Love at first bite" a novel by me...

60) Stop ruining beautiful songs with your ugly pictures in your stories...

61) What a day nothing happened and i was tired...

62) Everytime I socialize im like okay thats enough for the next eleven days...

63) Call me childish but shit is soo much funnier when you're not supposed to be laughing...

64) Love that its summer hate that i have to shave my legs all the time now...

65) I put my symptoms into WebMD & it turns out I just have kids...

66) How dare you not invite me to something that i would have made an excuse to not go to and stay home anyway...

67) My bed is there for me in good and bad times thats the kind of support i deserve in life..

68) Don't trip over bitches. walk over them...

69) My life Is Simple Either let me Eat Or Let me Sleep...

70) Never take advice from me you will end up drunk...

71) My favorite childhood memory is having energy...

72) We all have that one friend who is always down to eat...

73) I dont make mistakes i date them...

74) I'm not late im just super early

for tomorrow...

75) Back off.. I have got enough to deal with today without having to make your death look like an accident...